KEY #H2: IF MY HOUSE HAD TO BE PERFECT . . .

"If my house had to be perfect
     to invite you in,
We'd be alone all the time,
     what a bore; what a sin!
Welcome, come in,
     we're glad you're here,
Whether you came
     from far or near.
A meal, a visit,
     an overnight stay.
You're part of the family,
     come what may.
Dust, dirty dishes,
     no gleam on the silver,
This isn't a showplace,
     it's home, we live here.
So take off your shoes,
     put up your feet,
I'll make the coffee,
     just have a seat.
(Poem written by a dear friend of mine, who wishes to remain anonymous)

When I was growing up in the country, people would just drop in at any time during the day to visit.  No one seemed to care if the house was in order or not.  Most of our neighbors were farm people, and it was generally understood that cooking and baking food for the men workers took top priority, over cleaning,  in the chores of the household.  They had to keep those men fit and full of energy for their hard field work!
We were not farm people at that time and my mother (and me!) faithfully cleaned our house every Saturday or thereabouts for Sunday, the Lord's day, and more frequently for expected company.  She did never once missed the deeper cleaning chores of spring cleaning.  In fact, my grandmother even washed all her woodwork weekly!  My grandmother and mother enjoyed a clean house, and so do I!
But when a neighbor or friend dropped in, I don't remember ever hearing my mom apologize for the state of semi-disorganization it was in at that particular time.  People knew that houses were to live in . . . to do projects in . . . to relax and play in. . .
When I moved to the Minneapolis area in 1985, I was struck by the difference of viewpoint regarding hospitality.  Suddenly, it seemed as though the main priority was the appearance of one's house.  I delighted in decorating my new home and tried to keep it clean, but quickly learned to feel embarrassed and apologetic when someone dropped in unexpectedly and my home was not spotless.  I found wonderful, gracious friends who didn't seem to mind if my house was not up to par but my newfound attitude seriously affected my view of the practice of hospitality.  I do appreciate the modern custom of calling first when convenient (that is, if you want to find me fully dressed!)  Some days, I have words on my mind that need to get down on paper immediately before they fly away forever, so I've been known to begin my day at the computer in my furry lavender bathrobe with my hair undone.  So you can keep calling ahead whenever possible!  :)  But if I had to keep my house in ship shape presentation at all times, I would never accomplish anything else.
My husband, on the other hand, still invites people to "drop in"any time.  He is very comfortable with that.  I truly enjoy having people over, but have been known to struggle with "panic attacks" involving furious activity at the prospect that leave him bewildered.  Can anyone relate???  I do hope so!!!
I've been wondering about God's view on the particular practice of hospitality.  So I decided to delve into God's Word to see what He had to say about it.
Here are a few passages I found:
In Romans 12:13, "practicing hospitality" is listed as one of the gifts of the Spirit.
In 1 Timothy 3:2, where Paul is listing the qualifications for "overseers"(deacons, elders, etc.) of the church, he states that "an overseer must be . . . hospitable."  This is also affirmed in Titus 1:8.
In 1 Peter 4:9, all Christians are admonished to "Be hospitable to one another without complaint." "Without complaint?"  Hmmm . . . without fear of embarrassment?
During Old Testament times, before Jesus came to earth, hospitality was considered so vital that it was a regular practice to invite traveling strangers into one's home.  It was viewed as shameful to allow a stranger passing through town to spend the night in the town square with no invitation for a place to sleep.
In the New Testament, we see that Jesus was often at the home of Mary and Martha, possibility to seek a respite from the crowds, or simply to enjoy the companionship of dear friends.
Breaking bread together as Christians was a valued costume.  Hearts and minds were often opened and made vulnerable over a meal, or simply coffee or tea.  That is still true today.
Hebrews 13:2 reads, "Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it."  Now isn't that an intriguing thought!?!  Although, I do admit in this day and culture, safety issues must unfortunately be considered.  I never unlock the door to a strangers when my husband is not available!  Although we always need to be open to God's leading in a particular situation.
Anyway, it seems to me that God still places a high value on the practice of hospitality and expect us to make good use of it today.  
So what does this all mean to me . . . and you?
I enjoy decorating my house and appreciate it more when things are freshly clean and organized.  But I need to get over the panicky feeling of hearing company is coming and I'm not prepared or don't foresee the time to do so.
But in spite of my occasional lapses into frantic activity, I love to have people visit us!  I love to open up our "Stai Bed and Breakfast" for treasured family and friends!  My own feelings regarding the state of my house are just that  . . my own feelings.  Of pride, perhaps . . . not good . . . although I do want to honor my guests with comfortable, clean surroundings.  That is truly a heart desire of mine.
One day, many years ago, when our family had moved to a Minneapolis suburb, we were looking for a church.  It was a Saturday morning.  Our kids were occupied elsewhere, so my husband and I were home alone.  Now Saturday tends to be the day I do my weekly cleaning.  So my house was still awaiting attention in this area . . . with a husband, dogs, and three kids, need I say more???  Gary (my husband) was sick, so he was still in his pajamas, with hair uncombed.  And our washing machine chose that day to refuse to function and carry out it's regular duties.  So Gary was in the basement working on it.  I was in my cleaning grubbies with a bandana scarf tied over my hair, planning to clean first and wash up later.    For some reason, Gary had hauled his huge, oversize shop vacuum cleaner up to the entrance hall of our split level home, where it stood imposingly by the front door.  I had just begun to sweep that same hall, gathering the dirt together in one prominent spot, when the doorbell rang.  Gary came up the basement stairs as I threw the front door open to find the pastor of a church we had recently visited standing there with a friendly smile on his face . . . properly dressed in Sunday clothes, of course!
Utterly humiliated, I immediately started apologizing and explaining, "I'm so sorry, Gary is sick and our washer broke down, I'm cleaning, we didn't expect you (which I could have assumed was obvious!) . . . "
He just looked around at us and calmed remarked, "That's all right.  This is how you live."
I had all I could do to restrain my hands from gripping his shoulders, shaking him and responding, "NO!  This is NOT how we live!  This is an extraordinarily BAD DAY!"  Since Gary was sick, the pastor didn't stay long, and I don't think we returned to his church.  The dear man meant well, but his unannounced visit was more than I could handle that day!
In my opinion, the Hospitality Poem (above) fits well with God's point of view.  He must have intended us to invite people into our homes not to share perfection (which isn't the case anyway), but to share our lives, to relate as real people living honestly before each other, to extend the warmth of understanding and companionship, and help to draw others closer to Jesus, the One who truly and perfectly loves.
So Lord, please forgive me for my pride and help me to handle the unexpected more graciously.  And also would You please help me manage my home a bit more effectively so I can appreciate Your daily surprises as a loving child of Yours would be expected to do?
Thanks for listening, friends and strangers!  May we all be gracious to one another and to each other's homes!
Tune in next week for some of my personal Hospitality Bloopers!  And we'll finish this series the following week with Hospitality Hints from Friends!