I feel so much better now that I have passed by the garbage truck. What a relief to get rid of that load of ugly, contaminated sin! The view is amazing from here. One thing I love about the Land of Abundant Living is that the seasons change frequently and I can pass from a gorgeous summer day with sparkling, diamond crusted lake waters into a brisk autumn scene with golden and raspberry toned trees within a matter of minutes. Reminds me of Minnesota weather! :o)
But what is this? Oh, oh, the next roadblock! A police car is pulling in behind me. I feel my foot lift slightly off the accelerator. But why on earth am I instinctively reacting like that? I am one of those rare citizens who still observe speeding laws as a regular practice. I have never gotten a speeding ticket and never expect to, unless it is some sort of a misunderstanding. So why do I automatically lift my foot at the sight of a police vehicle?
Guilt. But not real guilt. The symbol of the Law causes me to consider any possible wrongdoing. (More on that topic next week) Do you ever have feelings of guilt even though you know in your head that you have done nothing wrong? It happens to me every day. Part of the reason is that I set such high standards for myself that I am unable to attain. I want to be the perfect wife, mother, grandmother, friend, housekeeper, cook, writer, Bible study leader, gardener (Yes, really, it doesn't show at all, but the desire is there!). Etc. . . . And I inwardly scold myself when I can't reach my goals.
Then there are the questions from the enemy: "Why didn't you make that phone call you intended to make to the new person at church?" "Why didn't you write that letter or send that card?"
And his accusations: ""You cut your Bible reading short today!" (I love to spend time in God's Word, but interruptions happen!) "You should have spoken up when you had the chance; coward!" "You didn't check facebook again!"
The confusion: Why do churches have conflict and division? Why can't we all seem to share 'the mind of Christ?' How can people who genuinely love God differ so greatly in their opinions?
The realization: I can't figure everything out and I can't measure up! No matter how hard I try, I fall short!
The cure: Hang onto Jesus! Trust Him; trust His wisdom and His love. At times when I 'm with my precious grandsons, I just sit and watch them (but not for long, or they want Grandma to do something with them!) and my heart almost explodes with love for them! Then I remind myself that God loves me even more than I love my grandsons . . . or my children . . . and I can rest in that perfect love.
God, give me a calm peaceful spirit that can rest in You no matter how how incompetent I feel. Don't let me give into false guilt because I am only one person and cannot do all that I want to do. Help me to find the time to accomplish all that You intend for me to do this day, and be able to let the rest go. Your plans are all that matter! I want to deal with the real guilt in my life and let You wash it away with the blood of Jesus Christ. I don't need to deal with false guilt that wears me down and hinders my productivity.
Relieved again!
Oh, no, the police car has his siren on. I need to pull over. Beads of sweat break out on my forehead. He's approaching my car. What did I do wrong???
"Yes, officer?"
"I just wanted to stop you and thank you, Ma'am for obeying the laws of our Land. Have a pleasant day!"
Whew.
Copyrighted 2012 Linda Ruth Stai, Author and Inspirational Speaker
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